Scott Morrison refuses to pay Dragons’ COVID fines.

Prime Minister Scott Morrison has refused to pay the fines of the St George-Illawarra NRL players who breached COVID-19 protocols, just days after he paid the fine of Cronulla player Josh Dugan.

Morrison paid Dugan’s $25,000 COVID breach fine from his own pocket after admitting that he and his government are responsible for the current lockdowns in Greater Sydney due to the failed national vaccine rollout. When offering to pay Dugan’s fine, he conceded that an effective national vaccine roll out would have prevented lockdowns throughout the nation and Australians would be free to go to a restaurant with their friends.

“Let me make this very clear,” Morrison told the media.

“I pretend to follow the mighty Sharks, and Josh is a Sharks player. I don’t pretend to follow the Dragons. Why would I? There’s no political gain in that. It’s very simple. I’m not paying their fines.”

Dragons fans and other members of the community asked Morrison to pay the players fines which totalled more than $300,000. 13 players were punished for attending a party at Paul Vaughan’s house in Shellharbour while the region was in the middle of a strict lockdown.

Insiders believe Morrison refused to pay the fines not just because they play for a rival team, but because he was angry that Paul did not invite him to the party.

Image:NuNa

Scott Morrison to pay Josh Dugan’s fine.

Prime Minister Scott Morrison will pay Josh Dugan‘s fine after the Sharks veteran was caught breaching COVID protocols.

Dugan earned yet another nomination for The Frownlow Medal when he was caught dining in a restaurant in Sydney recently, in contravention of the NRL COVID-19 bio-security protocols. The ageing centre was fined $25,000 and the prime minister has promised to reach into his own pocket to cover the fine.

The Frownlow Medal is awarded to the player whose off-field demeanour epitomises the values of the modern-day footballer and draws attention to the status of footballers as role models to young Australians. It covers Australia’s four major football codes; the National Rugby League (NRL), Australian Football League (AFL), the A-League (Football) and Rugby Union’s Super Rugby competition. NRL player Shaun Kenny-Dowall won the inaugural medal in 2015, while AFL player Elijah Taylor is the most recent recipient.

Dugan was initially shocked at such a generous offer from the leader of the nation, despite the fact that Morrison is the club’s number one ticket holder.

“Yeah, nah mate, I couldn’t believe it,” Dugan explained.

“But then Scotty told me why. He said he loves the Sharks. Well, he loves them now, he grew up in the Eastern Suburbs so he’s probably a Roosters fan, but anyway. He goes to all our games and stuff, but said he paid my fine for a different reason.”

“He said he kind of feels like it’s his fault that I got fined. See, he handles all that COVID vaccination stuff, because he’s the PM, and it’s been a real shambles. He said that if more people in Australia had been vaccinated by now, pretty much everyone could go to restaurants whenever they want. We wouldn’t all be in lockdown and you wouldn’t get fined just for going out for dinner with a mate.”

“So, I said, yeah, that makes sense – thanks for the money Scotty.”

Dugan will also have to stay away from the Cronulla team for a fortnight, and Morrison is expected to join him in his period of isolation.

“We’ll sit on the roof in bean bags and drink Bacardi Breezers, cos that’s the kind of classy guy that Scotty is.”

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Gladys Berejiklian saves the NRL.

NSW Premier Gladys Berejiklian blocked the appointment of Mick Fuller to the Australian Rugby League Commission in order to help the NRL win back The Frownlow Medal.

Berejiklian denied the NSW Police Commissioner the opportunity to sit on the board of the ARLC because he is an expert in ‘setting behavioural expectations’ who would have prevented the NRL from winning back the medal they held for five straight years until 2020.

The Frownlow Medal is awarded to the player whose off-field demeanour epitomises the values of the modern-day footballer and draws attention to the status of footballers as role models to young Australians. It covers Australia’s four major football codes; the National Rugby League (NRL), Australian Football League (AFL), the A-League (Football) and Rugby Union’s Super Rugby competition. NRL player Shaun Kenny-Dowall won the inaugural medal in 2015, while AFL player Elijah Taylor is the most recent recipient.

The Frownlow Medal Hall of Fame honours former players and players who received media attention in previous seasons, for similarly scandalous behaviour, and its inductees include Ben Cousins and Julian O’Neill.

“I love Rugby League and the NRL,” boasted Berejiklian at a press conference.

“As a Sydney girl, I’ve always loved league more than AFL, Union and Soccer. I pretend to love Macarthur FC, for the same reason the Prime Minister pretends to love the Cronulla Sharks: it helps win votes.”

“I was devastated to see the AFL steal the Frownlow from us last year, and I’m determined to do whatever I can to make sure an NRL player wins it this year. For this reason, I used my power as premier to block the appointment of Mr Fuller to the ARLC board because he would have stamped out player misbehaviour and held wayward players to account. If NRL players are not allowed to get up to mischief off the field, they’ll never win the Frownlow.”

The league-loving premier also asked the public to show greater understanding towards footballers when they misbehave.

“Footballers, like politicians, are role models to young Australians, so we should not be too quick to judge their personal behaviour. The LNP rewards misbehaviour with promotion and ministerial appointments, and naughty footballers are rewarded with nominations for The Frownlow Medal. I would hate to see either of these situations change.”

The Premier then confirmed that her own party is no stranger to personal scandal and protecting people who commit those scandals.

“Right now, our nation’s leader seems to be protecting an alleged rapist who works for the LNP, at the same time that four rugby league players are under investigation for sexual assault.”

“Finally, this issue is also a great way to distract the public from the failures of my government.”

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Jarryd Hayne calls for Hillsong to host Frownlow awards night.

Rugby League star Jarryd Hayne believes the awards night for The Frownlow Medal must be held at Hillsong Church in Sydney’s western suburbs.

Hayne is a member of the hugely popular Evangelical megachurch and is a favourite to win The Frownlow Medal in 2019 after being charged with sexual assault.

The Frownlow Medal is awarded to the player whose off-field demeanour epitomises the values of the modern-day footballer and draws attention to the status of footballers as role models to young Australians. It covers Australia’s four major football codes; the National Rugby League (NRL), Australian Football League (AFL), the A-League (Football) and Rugby Union’s Super Rugby competition. NRL player Shaun Kenny-Dowall won the inaugural medal in 2015 and code-swapper Karmichael Hunt was the most recent recipient.

The Frownlow Medal Hall of Fame honours former players and players who received media attention in previous seasons, for similarly scandalous behaviour, and its inductees include Ben Cousins and Julian O’Neill.

Hayne believes Hillsong Church is a superior venue to The Star, Sydney, which is the traditional home of the award’s night for the most prestigious award in Australian sport.

“Sure, lots of guys have been nominated for stuff that happened at The Star,” Hayne conceded.

“Even Corey (Norman, 2016 Frownlow Medallist) got busted with pills there, but Hillsong is better – it rocks. It’s a huge venue, they have wicked concerts and stage shows and the atmosphere is massive,” he argued.

The former NRL player, who has not been found guilty of sexual assault, also believes it could attract distinguished guests to the ceremony.

“We could get ScoMo to go. He loves new age Pentecostal churches and he’s a huge footy fan. He could hand out the awards. I reckon if we told him he could wear a baseball cap and sink some schooners, he’d do it for sure.”

Holding the ceremony at Hillsong may also appease two other leading candidates, Israel Folau and Manase Fainu, who have an affinity with churches in the western suburbs of Sydney. Folau lost his multi-million dollar Rugby Union contract for expressing views he cultivated at a church in western Sydney, while Fainu will soon face court after being accused of stabbing someone during a brawl outside a church in western Sydney.

Hillsong faces strong competition for hosting rights. The Star is a very popular haunt with Frownlow nominees, while La Favela nightclub in Bali is where recent nominees Nelson Asofa-Solomona and David Fifita attracted the attention of Frownlow judges.

Wherever the event is held, all in attendance are sure to be filled with some sort of spirit.

Image: NuNa