Sex, Drugs and the Common Troll Carry Corey Norman to The Frownlow Medal.


Illicit drug use, pictures with known criminals and an opportunistic social media troll helped earn NRL player Corey Norman The Frownlow Medal for 2016.

Norman was arrested for possession of MDMA just days after a fellow footballer posted photos of him on social media dining with known criminals.

He then secured his grip on The Frownlow Medal when an opportunistic and amorous young woman offered media outlets a video of him involved in a particularly enjoyable warm down session.


“I’m on a high!!!!,” he exclaimed when informed of the decision.

“This is such a huge honour mate. It’s unbelievable. I’m lost for words. I can’t believe it. I put in the hard yards the whole year. It’s been so tough trying to win this medal, but I did it.”

The Frownlow Medal is awarded to the player whose off-field demeanour epitomises the values of the modern day footballer and draws attention to the status of footballers as role models to young Australians. It covers Australia’s four major football codes; the National Rugby League (NRL), Australian Football League (AFL), the A-League (Football) and Rugby Union’s Super Rugby competition. The first medal was awarded to Sydney Roosters and New Zealand representative Shaun Kenny-Dowall in 2015.

Norman played strong throughout the season.

He scooped up a grubber kick from dog loving Rooster Mitchell Pearce, then side stepped a chopstick wielding Dustin Martin, from the Richmond Tigers.

He threw a dummie to the carefree Cane Toads and the wayward Warriors and sliced through the sloppy tackles of the four drunken Western Force players.

He did a run-around with Semi Radradra and fooled egg throwing Dally M medallist Jason Taumalolo, who finished the season with egg on his own face after the Cowboys lost to Cronulla, who eventually won the grand final with four Frownlow nominees, including everybody’s best mate, Andrew Fifita.

Norman used the explicit video to prove that he is no virgin, just like fellow nominee Sam Thaiday, and to demonstrate the correct use of an appendage to the young owner of the mystery penis which was featured in a selfie at an official Wests Tigers function.

The Eels play maker then lept over Kurt Mann‘s goanna before scoring under the black dot.

His post try celebration stuck it to opposing fans, just like the A-League’s sole nominee, Daniel Georgievski, from Melbourne Victory.

He then hit the town with young Essendon Bomber Gach Nyuon, whose abuse of an Uber driver ushered in a new era of scandalous behaviour for Australian-based footballers.

When Norman was revealed to have been implicated in the Parramatta club’s player payment scandal, he jumped to an unassailable lead in the prestigious inter-code competition.

In recognition of his outstanding off-field achievements, the Parramatta Eels offered the play-maker a contract for the 2017 season.

“Corey’s victory in the Frownlow Medal is an enormous source of pride for the Parramatta Eels. The award is an appropriate way to cap off a magnificent season for the club,” read a statement from the Eels.

As well as the prestigious Frownlow Medal, the victor was presented with a long list of prizes.

  • Two nights twin share in the famous government lodgings in Long Bay, on Sydney’s beautiful eastern beaches, including one complimentary interactive spa experience and one complimentary individual portrait photography session.
  • A three month volunteer internship with an Australian federal service agency.
  • One complimentary RSA course from a nationally accredited training provider.
  • 12-month cab charge.

The Frownlow Medal judges thank all of the nominees for their participation in this year’s award and anticipate an even bigger year in 2017.

First published in October 2016.

Image: Nuna


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