Jimmy Buckley is yet another victim of Wife Saviour Complex. The former AFL player is the latest footballer to rely on his female partner to save him from the self-destruction which earned him a nomination for The Frownlow Medal Hall of Fame.
The Frownlow Medal is awarded to the player whose off-field demeanour epitomises the values of the modern-day footballer and draws attention to the status of footballers as role models to young Australians. It covers Australia’s four major football codes; the National Rugby League (NRL), Australian Football League (AFL), the A-League (Football) and Rugby Union’s Super Rugby competition. NRL player Shaun Kenny-Dowall won the inaugural medal in 2015, while NRL star Talatau Amone is the most recent recipient.
The Frownlow Medal Hall of Fame honours former players and players who received media attention in previous seasons, for similarly scandalous behaviour, and its inductees include Ben Cousins and Julian O’Neill.
Buckley spent decades addicted to alcohol and has only recently returned to sobriety. The former Carlton prodigy joined the club at just 16 years of age and soon became one of its best players. He won the best and fairest award at the Blues in 1982 at a time when the club was winning premierships and supplying multiple players to the All-Australian squad.
He was also partying hard in an era when everyone partied hard. He admitted that everyone associated with the club expected him to have a drink in his hand, and that this eventually became a daily addiction.
“I was on a self-destructive alcohol-fuelled binge that was taking me nowhere other than deeper into the dark side. And I had let a lot of people down over a long period and it was time to do something about it,” he told the media.
His poison was beer, white wine or rose, because he was not a fan of red wine or spirits.
The former ruckman also admitted to being a victim of Wife Saviour Complex.
Women exhibiting signs of Wife Saviour Complex stick by their man through his terrible behaviour. They rescue him from his drug and alcohol abuse, his driving offences and public humiliation. They tolerate his partying and infidelity, and forgive his latest social media faux pas, plus his nudity, racism, sexism, homophobia and destruction of property. The women are left to pick up the pieces when the player gets fined or arrested, and spends time behind bars. They console their man when he gets suspended from his club, or sacked. In some cases, the Wife Saviour suffers psychological, emotional or physical abuse. They suffer through all of these behaviours, even during ‘Women’s Round’.
Many footballers eventually separate from the Wife Saviour then date a younger, more beautiful woman once they’ve been saved, leaving the saviour to fend for themselves.
“I must give a lot of credit to Penny, my partner at the time, who was so supportive when the call was made, as was Debbie who has been a great mother to our two kids in Dylan and Jess.”
Soon his own son assumed the role. Dylan, who himself played AFL, was the one who dropped Jimmy at the Melbourne rehabilitation clinic after trying to convince his father for three weeks. Dylan says he saw his father was struggling with depression and mental health fuelled by alcohol.
“I decided it was my problem, not my mum’s anymore, so I had to do something. It was really hard having waited 28 years to say something. Growing up I always knew (the problem) but could never have those conversations with dad because our relationship was a surface one.”
Buckley now speaks proudly of his sobriety. He recently attended the wake of a friend and did not drink despite being surrounded by former Aussie Rules players whom he described as “…400 of the biggest drinkers…”
If Buckley attends the awards night for The Frownlow Medal and The Frownlow Medal Hall of Fame later this year, will he once again be a victim of Wife Saviour Complex?
Image: NuNa
The Frownlow Medal 